Co-parenting, especially after a messy split can be very difficult. Overcoming any built up resentment and getting past the painful history you may have with your ex can at times seem impossible. But, while it’s true that co-parenting is not a walk in the park, it’s the best way to ensure your children are able to retain close relationships with both of you and that their needs are met. A few co-parenting tips for divorced parents can be quite helpful.
Setting anger and hurt aside
The secret to successful co-parenting is to focus on your children. This means setting aside any strong feelings to work cooperatively with your ex. This may be easier said than done but is it most vital. Co-parenting is not about your feelings, or those of your ex, but rather about your child’s stability, happiness and future well being. If you have any issues with your ex, resolve to solve them away from your children.
Communicating with your ex
Purposeful, peaceful and consistent communication with your ex is essential to successful co-parenting. It can be really tough, especially when dealing with a difficult ex, but it all begins with your mindset. Think about communication with your ex as having a direct impact on your child’s well being. Making your children the focal point in every discussion you have with your ex can help you to conduct yourself with dignity.
The main idea is to establish consistent communication with your ex to figure out the type of contact that works best for you. Whether talking in person, on phone or email, the goal is to initiate and maintain effective communication.
Parenting as a team
Teamwork with your ex makes it easy to agree on issues. One way to do this is to aim for consistency. While it’s healthy for children to be flexible by exposing them to different environments and perspectives, they need to understand that they are living under the same set of expectations at each home. This helps to avoid confusion. Divorce and separation can be a tough transition for you and your children but putting in some effort can make co-parenting work.
